This is another afternoon edition of LO649, so I may be a bit more brief and to the point. How do you get on the same page with someone else? How does life feel like you and others are pulling the rope the same direction and not playing tug of war?
I think it comes down to sharing intent and standing on common ground. Often I write about questions that come up, working through the struggles of raising my kids. This is another one of those passages.
The latest struggle has been to have Gregory and Olivia join the B3 program: Builders Beyond Borders, where high school age kids spend a week a year building a structure like a school or bridge for the people in a village in a third world country. To get there the kids have to raise money for the trip and then take up one of their school vacations to participate in the week. It is a great program that helps others and actively gives back to the world. But my high school age kids don’t want to do it.
There have been other instances where we parents have wanted something for our kids, but the plans we put in place are pushed back on. And although we could force things to happen, it is not the spirit of how we want things to work. My intentions may have been good, but that intent was not shared by all.
And so I have realized that sharing the intent first and gaining common ground on that is a better first step. Heck, we need to have some common ground somewhere! And if we can agree on the intentions, we can more easily find a solution that will satisfy the intent.